Wes Tibbets said...
It's hard to get a feel on what genre it would fit in Josh. There's a lot of great potential here but it's all over the place. It felt congested as I read through it. I think if you condensed what you have in the verses and tighten up your rhyme scheme, you'll be okay. You could basically write two songs with all the material you have here. It just depends on what you're reaching for. When I read, I read it as country music but the way it is written, it doesn't really fit that genre with its length, schemes and verbage. I like your writing a lot though. It looks like you have an idea for it. I hope it works out for you. Best wishes!
Appreciate the feedback. Glad you thought there was something here, even if it might be buried. I wrote it with an indie folk-blues mindset, so it probably wouldn't flow too well if you tried reading it as country. But I do plan to clean it up, maybe trim off a few lines and generally make it a little more coherent. That's my problem with songs like this, is I just have so much to say that I end up dumping too much in one spot and it gets sort of convoluted.
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