''Sleeping With Someone Else.''

Dennis Wright
Song title/ ‘’ Sleeping With Someone else’’
© 2013
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Verse 1:
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My intuition been telling me that something is wrong
You been acting so differently when you come home
Things have not been the same between you and me
For quite sometime baby

Verse 2:
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When we made love the night before,I heard a knock at the door
You said that it was the wind blowing strong
But a voice in the back of my head
Kept telling me that it was her

Chorus:
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You might as well tell me the truth
Cause you ain't fooling no one but yourself
You been coming home with hickies on you
I know that you been sleeping with someone else

Verse 3:
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Friday evening I drove down to the story
Picked up a few items for dinner and guess who I saw
Standing in line in front of me
Some woman cashing a check, that had your name on it

Chorus:
______

Bridge Chorus:
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Sense we been together, I've  never lied are cheated on you
You’re the one who is in denial
You keep saying you done nothing wrong
But boy you are dead wrong

 

Chorus

Powerful poem...really sad, but flows well regardless. A couple grammatical errors I saw: "grocery story" to "grocery store" and "sense you" to "sinse you", and "I have never lied are..." to "I have never lied or". Sorry I just see those type of things before anything else, hope that helps!

In my opinion, I think it would have read a little smoother if there was a little bit of a stronger rhyme scheme, but that's of course up to your discretion and how the song sounds in your head. Overall though, solid song! If you were looking for any other critiques or a different angle of looking at it, just let me know

Thank you Mr. Church for commenting. Do you have any suggestions are thoughts to help me improve this lyric. I would really appreciate it. I can really use some assistance. Thank you sir, God Bless. If lyric become viable; I'm willing to share 50/50 royalties and etc. Thanks my friend. Dennis Wright

Enjoyed Da Read.All Da Best with it.

Thank u for the feedback. I'm striving to be this good. You make songwriting look so easy. lol. Your friend Dennis

Keep or sweep my friend.